Another Invisible Birthday

Another Invisible Birthday

… your biological dad cries remembering your birthday every year.

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Our Souls at Night … Go!

I highly recommend a just out Netfllx movie starring Robert Redford and Jane Fonda acting but not looking their age, 81 and 79 respectively. They exquisitely depict neighbors who make a quite radical agreement to transcend loneliness in a geographically gorgeous Colorado town. Robert Ebert gave it thumbs up applauding the humor which ‘avoids the […]

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A Fond Farewell to an Ageless Mentor: Louise Hay

Louise Hay was an amazing woman whose message of self-love and acceptance empowered millions.

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Send a Mother's Day Card to YourSelf

Send a Mother’s Day Card to YourSelf

Send a Mother’s Day card to yourSelf … the one you’d love to see from any child, adult or institution that is keeping you from being close to those important young people you’d love to nourish more. Here are some from my Invisible/Alienated Grandparent Support Group I run for www.aga-fl.org.

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Easter Week Wisdom

HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE All I need to know I learned from the Easter Bunny! Don’t put all your eggs in one basket. Everyone needs a friend who is all ears. There’s no such thing as too much candy. All work and no play can make you a basket case. A cute tail attracts a lot […]

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Add Visible Grandchild #3 to my Gene Pool ...

Add Visible Grandchild #3 to my Gene Pool …

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It’s Not About Profits … It’s connections.

“We’re exhausted, just come back from a weekend of babysitting our two and four-year-old grandkids and we’re so tired we can’t believe we ever did this 24/7. It rubs the fact in that we’re old! We can’t do this very often. Right now we’re resting in invisibility.”

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Grace & Frankie a Hilarious yet Solemn Look at Aging

Grace & Frankie a Hilarious yet Solemn Look at Aging

I’ve loved this Amazon series since its beginning season in 2015. Silly yet serious stereotypical same sex stuff between men, and relationships that deepen as two newly ‘single’ women are thrown to live together in Malibu California. Beautiful Jane Fonda at 79 is playing straight business like Grace at 73, and hippie dippy Lily Tomlin […]

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Write Yourself a Valentine

Write Yourself a Valentine

Write yourself a Valentine! Yesterday in my Alienated Grandparents Anonymous (aga-fl.org) support group after updating each other on our “stories” we imagined and wrote a love letter to ourselves from the persons (adult children, grandkids) we felt the most estranged from, as if in the best of all possible worlds good had happened. It was […]

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When is Enough, Enough? Rain & Snow I Mean

When is Enough, Enough? Rain & Snow I Mean

Is this wondrous rain the trees and plants need here in CA, enough? Roads are blocked here with mudslides and uprooted trees, and at China Peak/Shaver Lake where my son and wife and live and work managing 120 condos this is what it looks like. I’m blessed to live on the Central Coast where it […]

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FROM INVISIBLE TO VISIBLE .. DELICOUS & EXHAUSTING

FROM INVISIBLE TO VISIBLE .. DELICOUS & EXHAUSTING

This in-person grandparenting is exhausting and delight-full.

This in-person grandparenting is exhausting and delight-full.
This in-person grandparenting is exhausting and delight-full.

This in-person grandparenting is exhausting and delight-full.
In-person grandparenting is exhausting AND delight-full.

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Barbara Boxer in Person! The Art of Tough

Barbara Boxer in Person! The Art of Tough

I saw Barbara Boxer Tuesday at a benefit for Planned Parenthood and 44th anniversary Roe/Wade … did you know that only 4% of what that org founded by Margaret Sanger a century ago does is abortions? Mainly is preventive health care for low income women. She urged all of us on different issues work together […]

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LA LA LAND … A Valentine to Los Angeles and Love

I know why LA LA LAND walked away, no, ran away with so many of The Golden Globes Awards. It was a musical with all of the elements of classic Ginger Rogers/Bing Crosby dancing, set in current time Los Angel-ese, with fantastic acting, costumes, cinematography and story line. It was a love story in which […]

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What Got to Me Most at the Golden Globes?

I watch the Globes for a preview of films I must get to before the Oscars … yet this year I was distracted.

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A Baby Blessing for the New Year

A Baby Blessing for the New Year

Now as we face the unknown, witness the ‘welcome to the world’ we all should repeat for all we are passing the baton to.

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More Important than ever: Wear Purple Today

After a shocking election in which the electoral system placed not the first woman in the White House, but a dangerously unstable man with a history of degrading not only women but races, religions and the environment; I am reminded of the blog I wrote as a letter to my grandchildren in Nov 2012. In […]

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"I love you, man." Bromance in my face is O.K.

“I love you, man.” Bromance in my face is O.K.

Note: I performed this at an Osher Lifelong Learning Institute class to many laughs & nods. Comments appreciated. “David may call, all right if we talk tonight? He needs to talk,” my husband asked.  “Sure,” I said, “go ahead, and call your boyfriend. I’ll play with food. Dinner’ll take 45 minutes at least. Oh, and […]

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Grandmother YourSelf today!

Grandmother YourSelf today!

Comma’s save lives, chuckle chuckle. Today is the day for fond remembrances of all the good meals you may have had or heard about from your own ancestors … and to “Grandmother Yourself.” Take each day like it is a special birthday and give yourself special treats only an understanding grandmother could provide. Honor your […]

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SEPT 11th IS NATIONAL GRANDPARENTS DAY BUT SOME WILL MISS OUT

Each September some 70 million American grandparents celebrate National Grandparents’ Day, but countless numbers will not because they are alienated or estranged from their adult children and thus their grandkids.

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First Woman President: About Time!

First Woman President: About Time!

July 28, 2016 First Woman President: About TIME! Dear Annie: It’s sad that at 14 I have no idea how political your family is, or how your teachers are addressing this important election year, if at all. Did you watch any of the Democrat National Convention (DNC) on TV? I couldn’t bear to watch the […]

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Make Birthday's Special No Matter What the Age

Make Birthday’s Special No Matter What the Age

May all of you approach your birth-days with love for your selves first, then those close and far.

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‘GRANDMOTHER YOURSELF’ WITH PEACE THIS MOTHER’S DAY

‘GRANDMOTHER YOURSELF’ WITH PEACE THIS MOTHER’S DAY

This is Maxine, my 89-year-old mother-in-law, at her second-born son’s fourth wedding this week. Probably three-fourths of those pictured on the rock are descendant from her gene pool. You can tell from all the faces how much love she’s passed on. I once asked her if she’d help me draw a family tree. She replied […]

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Boycott Beyonce!

Boycott Beyonce!

April 26, 2016 Dear Annie: As I was surfing the TV dials the other night I came across a new video-concert special by Beyonce called “Lemonade.” Now I’ve heard her music and liked some of it, but don’t watch music videos much and hadn’t seen more than fleeting images of her body. Well the first […]

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Women on Dollar Bills … Finally

April 21, 2016 Dear Annie, You’ve probably handled many dollar bills with George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, Alexander Hamilton, Thomas Jefferson and other “founding fathers” of the great country we live on them. Well, finally women are going to be featured on the money we and everyone else who lives in or visits the U.S. handles. […]

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Dear Fourteen Year Old Annie!

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Dear Fourteen Year Old Annie!

I have been remiss in writing and posting letters to you. Ten years have gone by since I last saw you and first started writing and saving letters. I just came across my favorite picture of you from when you were just one in my jewelry box. How sad that time and distance and the […]

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Book Review Erica Jong’s: Fear of Dying

How did I not hear that Erica Jong’s 10th novel Fear of Dying has been out since September? In 1973 when I was 28 and single in New York City, her Fear of Flying was pivotal to my professional development as a sex educator, writer and more importantly my search for intimacy for four decades. […]

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It's Time for Virtual Christmas Giving

It’s Time for Virtual Christmas Giving

Happy Holidays … VIRTUAL CHRISTMAS by Pat Hanson, Ph.D. © A Miracle Under the Tree: Real Stories of Hope, Faith and the True Meaning of Christmas – Harlequin 2012   I prefer Halloween to Christmas. You have an excuse for putting on a mask, can dress up any way you’d like, and pretend. Soon after, […]

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A Baby Blessing the World's Children Need Now

A Baby Blessing the World’s Children Need Now

VERY VISIBLE GRANDPARENTING – A Live Streamed Baby Blessing Sunday I stood on the stage of our church facing 100 + people, their palms outstretched toward my son, his wife, 14 month Sierra and my husband and I holding a laminated picture of five month old Ivan who lives on the East coast. His parents […]

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Happy Birthday Annie!

Happy Birthday Annie!

October 24th and you are 14 years old. I have no idea what you look like as a young woman or how comfortable or happy you are with school, your friends, your sisters and family. Since all I can do right now is just imagine what kind of celebration you had, today in honor of […]

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GRAND Magazine features we IGs – Submit Your Stories

I have been asked to be a regular columnist for GRAND Magazine that is celebrating its 11th birthday today. Please check out this lively informative magazine and log-in for your free subscription to this first issue; and by all means subscribe. I’m honored to be on their team. We are looking for Invisible Grandparents of […]

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Book Promotion: It May not be about Profits; It’s all About Connections

JOIN US FOR OUR NEXT MEETING-http://www.trivalleywriters.org/ Sept. 19, 2015: Promotion, Let’s Count the Ways. WARNING! It May Not Equal Profit: It’s All About Connection Dr. Pat Hanson – www.invisiblegradparent.com is a seasoned health and human sexuality educator, public speaker, workshop facilitator and writer residing on the Monterey Peninsula. Former co-chair of the Monterey/Santa Cruz chapter […]

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A Fireworks Aficionado Prays for Peace on 4th of July

A Fireworks Aficionado Prays for Peace on 4th of July

Fireworks by Pat Hanson (July 4, 2004) We’re fireworks aficionados My significant equal and I ‘saw the millennium spectacle in 1999 with half a million on Washington, DC’s mall Marked the 4th of 2000 ‘cross the river from Manhattan Island                 We revel in pop, crack, pound-your-heart outbursts […]

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LET’S HEAR IT FOR THE “GOOD-DADS”

LET’S HEAR IT FOR THE “GOOD-DADS”

Every year in June we commemorate and honor the role those men seeded (literally) in our lives. All too often the other 364 days of the year, media harps on the minority of absentee, unavailable, deadbeat or even abusive fathers. But on this one day, and all days, we should remember to thank the ‘good […]

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June 14th, 2015 is the first Grandparent Alienation Awareness Day

June 14th, 2015 is the first Grandparent Alienation Awareness Day

Hear from experts on invisible, estranged and alienated grandparenting and learn how we are not alone, can heal and work together to advocate for grandparents rights.

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Tai Chi: Fake it Gracefully

Dear Annie and Carter:   If you’d met me in person … you’d probably say “my granny is always busy with so many exciting things to do every day,” or “sometimes it is hard to keep up with her,” or “she moves so fast it’s hard to believe she is seventy.” Well, the secret to […]

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A Skype Baby Shower for a Visible Grandbaby still in the Oven

A Skype Baby Shower for a Visible Grandbaby still in the Oven

A SKYPE Baby Shower for my secondborn and his wife who opened presents with live guests and gifts from as far as Michigan, Utah, New York and Aromas,CA … whodda thunk it!?

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Proximity to a Growing Grandson's Politics .... How'd that Happen?

Proximity to a Growing Grandson’s Politics …. How’d that Happen?

Carter was eighteen months old when everyone at our wedding in Big Sur commented what a sweet well-behaved beautiful child he was, and what a great job his mother Lily was doing of parenting with her new husband. That was 14 years ago. I can count on my hands the number of times I visited […]

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MY MOTHERS DAY MESSAGE IS "YES .... and"

MY MOTHERS DAY MESSAGE IS “YES …. and”

The most important words when doing comedy improv are “YES AND…” Applying these two words allows for compassionate conversation and lifts people, even communities.

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This is what Visible Grandparenting Looks Like

This is what Visible Grandparenting Looks Like

Such fun .. an unexpected visit @ 7.5 month old Sierra and her great mom Nicole.

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LIFE ITSELF … a Touching Memoir/Documentary of Roger Ebert

It took two evenings for my 88 year old grand-mother-in-law and I to watch Martin Scorsese’s brilliant documentary of the entire life and times about Pulitzer Prize winning journalist and film critic Roger Ebert. What an honor it was to sit with the woman who left Kansas when she was 15 in 1940, found herself […]

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Glorious Women Never Age?

Glorious Women Never Age?

My husband’s 88 year old mother, is a tiny wisp of a thing, 78 pounds, sparkling eyes, smooth skin, mind clear as a tack. Her daily highlight is a dose of John Stewart followed by the PBS News Hour. She definitely is a glorious woman; that is when she isn’t having an arrhythmia as she […]

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COMMENTARY ON MY BOOK FROM WRITERS DIGEST

Judge’s Commentary* 22ND ANNUAL SELF PUBLISHED BOOK AWARDS : Invisible Grandparenting is a valuable book on a topic that doesn’t get a lot of ink, but is part of many people’s lives. The author has the advantage of being in the situation herself, and knows the ins and outs, the pain and the pitfalls, of […]

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Dear Annie : You have a new sister!

Dear Annie : You have a new sister!

January 5, 2015 Dear Annie … I finally had the nerve to look you up on Facebook. At first I couldn’t find any with your combination of names; I guess that at 13 you may not have started that addictive game that some people get into constantly. That made me feel good. I did however […]

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Sad Angels

Sad Angels

Three days before Christmas and I haven’t done any shopping except for food, and nor do I intend to. This time it’s by choice, not circumstance. We’ve an Audi and a BMW in the driveway and we are not rushing to drive or fly anywhere. We can be right here at home with each other. […]

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Leave a Legacy of Love, Now! FREE performance Nov 21st

Leave a Legacy of Love, Now! FREE performance Nov 21st

PRESS RELEASE: For Calendars &/or a Feature – Questions: Pat Hanson, 831-601-9195 – phanson@csumb.edu What: LEAVE A LEGACY OF LOVE, NOW! A pre-holiday Happy Hour Special of storytelling, music & inspiration When: Friday, November 21st 4:30 p.m. Where: Vista Lounge, 7th floor – Park Lane Senior Living , 200 Glenwood Circle, Monterey, CA 93940 How: […]

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Promotion does not equal Profit ... An Independent Author's Taile

Promotion does not equal Profit … An Independent Author’s Taile

Promotion & Platform MAY NOT EQUAL PROFIT: An Independent Author’s Tale (c) Pat Hanson, Ph.D After the cases of my first book arrived, I held one misty-eyed in my hands. I’d done it. My four-decade dream of seeing my words in print had come true. When I first read Erica Jong’s Fear of Flying in […]

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Visible means VISIBLE these Days OMG! :   The Sequel to Invisible Grandparenting

Visible means VISIBLE these Days OMG! : The Sequel to Invisible Grandparenting

Back in July I blogged of my apprehensions about being a REAL grandparent, and bringing anyone into this troubled world these days. I called the outdoor pool where I’d seen dozens of toddlers and parents doing the hokey-pokey with babes in arms: “breeder city.” I both was horrified and empathized at what these innocent young […]

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Still is Still Movin'

Still is Still Movin’

Slow to wake this morning. 8:45 rolled around pretty quickly after the fresh fruit and yogurt breakfast my husband made for us. I read my Science of Mind Magazine meditation, and Marc Nepo’s daily treat of poetry and wisdom from The Book of Awakening; but my body wanted to go back to sleep. Yet something […]

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I am a REAL Grandparent: Sierra Neva Jones arrived!

I am a REAL Grandparent: Sierra Neva Jones arrived!

  Well folks … now I get to blog about “the real thang!” One year and one week from their wedding up at the ski resort where they met, my firstborn and his lovely bride Nicole gave birth to Sierra Neva … 6lbs 11 oz. STAY TUNED as I follow this new uncharted territory … […]

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Interactive On-line Workshop: Leave a Legacy of Love Now – Sat 9_27 9amPDT 12EDT

My First Interactive Workshop… Next Saturday:VIRTUAL GRANDPARENTING – Sept. 27, 2014 – 9am-11am Pacific Time: LEAVE A LEGACY OF LOVE, NOW! A Virtual Grandparenting Workshop Saturday, September 27, 2014 Noon till 2PM EDT On-line: Go to http://yanavcsl.org and enter the Sanctuary Registration: Voluntary $ Love offering Questions: pat@invisiblegrandparent.com 831-601-9195 *Do you “know in your bones” […]

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Reluctant Real Grandparent

July 7th 2014 – Reluctant Real Grandparent – The Sequel to Invisible Grandparenting   My “daughter-in-law,” whose beautiful wedding to my firstborn son was the epilogue to my first book: Invisible Grandparenting, is now six months pregnant … with a girl! One would think that after all the pain of separation I’d worked so hard […]

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Great Grandma Sitting

Great Grandma Sitting

“They should send GW over there to Iraq right now to see the mess he created,” my 88 year mother-in-law said, squinting at the 6:00 news, turning up the volume, waiting for the 7-8:00 p.m. version filtered through her favorite newscaster: John Stewart on The Comedy Channel.”   I’ve been doing ‘Omama-care’ for ten days […]

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Book Awarded at Los Angeles Book Festival Contest

Book Awarded at Los Angeles Book Festival Contest

Invisible Grandparenting, my first book, won its first award: an Honorable Mention in the non-fiction category in an independent authors and film-makers contest! It means I got to go to Los Angeles, pick up a plaque, and pitch my book for one minute (that’s a trick) before other award winners and hopefully agents at the […]

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Holidays are Hard on Invisible Grandparents

I’m very lucky this year to be celebrating what I call Gratitude Day, with turkey and all the trimmings modeled after the New Jersey ‘Loud Family’ I grew up in. Eight of us at my sister’s in Santa Barbara … first time all the descendents of my mother are in one place. May those of […]

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Creaking bones? Aging Positively? Moi?

Creaking bones? Aging Positively? Moi?

3:40 p.m. I am lying naked covered in a paper gown on a table in my doctor’s office, glad I had an I-phone to do e-mail while Agnieska Lech, M.D. took 20+ minutes to get to me. At 68, courtesy Medicare and United Health Care supplemental (hall-ey-loo-ya!), it was time for my annual ‘women’s health […]

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My book is on Amazon today!

My book is on Amazon today!

Oh my god! To paraphrase a few clichés “there are no accidents, no coincidences.” I just got notice that the book I’ve been working on for five years (!), just went up on Amazon.com today. October 24th. It’s Annie’s birthday. Annie, the source of my grief, my hopes, my prayers and the recipient of the […]

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It's Gratitude Week - Thank you's are Important

It’s Gratitude Week – Thank you’s are Important

November 21, 2012 Dear Carter and Anne: I’ll bet the smells of pies being baked; turkey roasting are filling your homes. Instead of Thanksgiving Day I call this “Gratitude Week.” I make a point of writing or calling people to thank them for things big or little they have done this year that helped me. […]

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THE ELECTION'S OVER ... Let's wear purple!

THE ELECTION’S OVER … Let’s wear purple!

Wednesday, November 7, 2012! Dear Anne & Carter: Where I live, people climb up on the sand dunes on Route One and write messages in ice plant every day. Usually it’s love notes, or Happy Birthday Joe!’ type of things; but yesterday’s read: BAROCK THE VOTE! And Thank Goodness he did!! I make no bones […]

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Monthly Gatherings of Crones in Monterey

Monthly Gatherings of Crones in Monterey

MONTHLY GATHERINGS OF CRONES Continuing November 11th, 2012 2-4pm Every 2nd Sunday: Nov 11th, Dec 9th, Jan 13th, Feb 10th, Mar 10th, April14th, etc. Monterey Peace Resource Center 1364 Fremont Blvd Seaside, CA 93955 2$ Love Offering to Peace Center Monthly gatherings of women of age, sharing stories, gifting us with workshops with their own […]

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Happy 10th Birthday!

Happy 10th Birthday!

October 24, 2012 Dear Anne: Happy Birthday! Wow … you have been growing up a full decade, ten years! I can hardly imagine what you must look like, or what type of birthday party you and your very creative mother have planned. The last one I went to you were three. It was ninety degrees […]

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RED TENT CEREMONIES .. welcome to womanhood!

RED TENT CEREMONIES .. welcome to womanhood!

This is the latest letter to my invisible grand-daughter … October 15, 2012 Dear Anne, You’ll be ten years old on October 24th! How I wish I could see how you are growing into a young woman, a “maiden” in the three phases of women’s lives: Maiden, Mother and Crone. The maiden is the stage […]

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Pat Hanson Promotes Aging Positively!

Pat Hanson Promotes Aging Positively!

The senior page in our local newspaper The Monterey County Herald wrote a grrreat piece on what I do and will continue to thanks to support like this and from all of you! A link to read the entire article is in the ABOUT ME section.

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Jane Fonda as Invisible Grandparent!

Jane Fonda as Invisible Grandparent!

Jane Fonda latest movie “Peace Love and Mis-Understanding,” made me cry: my criteria for a good movie. Aging hippie flower-child aptly named Jane Fonda, sporting a long curly grey streaked wig, is surprised by a visit to her Woodstock farm by her 40-something stuffy NYC attorney daughter (Catherine Keener) and her teenage children. For reasons […]

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Happy Mother's Day!

Happy Mother’s Day!

“Mother’s hold their children’s hands for a little while, but they hold their hearts forever” was the quote on the program in church this morning. I got misty-eyed as I do every week when the children come in to sit in front of the choir. Forget about wondering what my grandaughter looks like or whether […]

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Little Squeeze, Big Squeeze

Little Squeeze, Big Squeeze

BLOG – Little Squeeze/Big Squeeze  – April 22, 2012 The artist/author of a great book I’ve just been gifted, Erin, Lee Gafill, tells of a day she’d taken her six year old nephew for a walk on the beach and as they came back: ‘’We saw a lone seal slide out of a wave onto […]

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Happy Resurrection Day!

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Happy Resurrection Day!

April 9, 2012 Dear Anne and Carter: Yesterday was Easter, and my eyes teared up as they do most weeks, as I watched the children file into our ‘rockin’ Gospel church’ (www.innerlightministries.com). Not too many people had on ‘Easter bonnets’ as I did. But as that tune of a very old song went came to […]

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Happy Birthday to Me! A-gain …

March 1st 2012 and I’m si …six … six-tee seven! How’d that happen? Here’s how, according to Mike Dooley in my favorite all time set of daily affirmations. Go to www.tut.com … I sent you. PAT PS If you want to see how I celebrate most years, I’ve added a peek at 9 years ago: […]

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Virtual Christmas Giving

Virtual Christmas Giving

Christmastime is hard on Invisible Grandparents, especially those of us who are experiencing hard times due to the economy. Please accept my story of Virtual Christmas Giving (Forthcoming in a Harlequin Press anthology 2012) of how our family transcended the commercialism of the holiday season as my gift to you. May your season be wonder-filled! […]

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What is this ITCHING about?

Saturday, March 19, 2011 At 66, ever grateful to have a doctor and visits that are paid for by Medicare, I’ve had a medical mystery for six months that neither my lovely, also sixty-something family practice doctor, nor my dermatologist can label anything but eczema (which means itch!), nor make go a-way. My skin itches. […]

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A Dream: Who’s Baby?

Friday, February 18, 2011 I had long drawn out dream just before dawn this morning. I’d been walking the halls of a huge old mansion, opening doors and looking under tables and beds, on shelves for my ‘stuff’’ that I’d left somewhere. It took hours. I saw other people’s sleeping bags, suitcases, piles of books, […]

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Happy Birthday! 11 is Huge!

Happy Birthday! 11 is Huge!

February 18, 2011 Dear Carter …  Happy Happy Birthday Ba-a-aby! How great to talk to you on your birthday!  As you can see from the collage birthday card I mailed … the theme is “Eleven is Huge!” What I meant is that your teenage years are just around the corner, and your years as a […]

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Amplified!

Amplified!

I’ve been told by two ex-husbands and several friends that I have a ‘broken listener.’ What they were referring to was my uncanny but annoying ability to talk over them and finish their sentences while they were speaking.  This was a bad habit I developed growing up in a Saturday Night Live New Jersey ‘Loud […]

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Do I Need an Optarectomy?

Do I Need an Optarectomy?

What’s that? An operation that blocks someone from seeing the world through their own asshole. I need one right now.  Another word for that view might be depression. Depression, the kind-of want to stay in bed all day, covers piled high, and not DO anything.  The kind that makes your skin crawl and eyes tear […]

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Existential Crisis Abated? Four’s a Charm?

Could four be the Charm! After whining to my writing group about my existential writing crisis, I got home yesterday to this response to my 4th query to Untreed Reads Publishing. They get 50% of sales and help with cover, layout, proofreading and promotion. Could I be looking at a contract soon? Jury’s still out. […]

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Existential Crisis #564

January 20, 2011 Existential Crisis # 564 in a lifetime of messages from the universe. Three rejections from the stellar book proposal for Invisible Grandparent that I worked so hard to ‘push out’ this spring. Three top selling East Coast based agents saying virtually the same thing. Back in July, “you’ve got an extremely interesting […]

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Destroy those demons of doubt! Focus on Love

Tuesday January 11th 2011 When I pulled myself out of our warm bed, shaking away dreams of Rensselaerville where some visionary/historic project was going on that I was not part of, I found Larry and gave him one of those fuzzy non-verbal bathrobe to bathrobe wordless first-thing-in-the-morning hugs. I honored him for getting up to […]

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Stillness, My Final Fronteir ..still

Thursday January 5th 2011 After three days of writing an article on deadline for Crone, a new magazine on women of ‘age,’ brushing off exhaustion, I decided to start the New Year by keeping my resolution to NOT check e-mail til I’d written at least one blog or letter for Invisible Grandparent. That was 2 […]

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Facebook isn’t always fun!

I spent about and hour wandering around Facebook, answering a message from someone I can’t even remember what about already, looking at some author profiles, specifically not checking my own or planning exactly what pictures and thoughts I’d like to put up there. Then I found myself checking the page for the mother of the […]

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Don't Forget Virtual Christmas Giving

Don’t Forget Virtual Christmas Giving

December 13, 2010 Saturday as was looking for the Christmas lights we adorn the garage door with, I came across a big white bag that had a surprise inside it that made me cry. I don’t remember when I bought this beautiful doll at a yard sale, thinking I’d save it for Anne, thinking it […]

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Rapunsel ... you go girl! See TANGLED!

Rapunsel … you go girl! See TANGLED!

Treat yourself to TANGLED this holiday season. In the theatre, in 3D if you can! It’s 98 minutes of pure scintillating visual fun! Strongest gutsy-est female protagonist I’ve seen in a Disney movie yet! GO!  I loved the drama, the music and the most expressive animated animals and ruffians I’ve ever seen. Mr. Right, though […]

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Holidays are Hard for Invisible Grandparents

Holidays are Hard for Invisible Grandparents

December 4, 2010 Dear Anne & Carter, no, actually this is for Suzie: Anne’s mother: Holiday seasons are hard on invisible grandparents! Do you realize that? Is there room for me, the biological grandmother of your firstborn, in that mind and memory of yours? Oh how I wish that were the case. I am taking […]

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Let’s hear it for functional families!

Let’s hear it for functional families!

Well I didn’t have to cook for three days straight, but I can count on one hand the times I got to sit down and breathe on Thanksgiving Day! The 2.8 year old great grandchild going on six, stole the show, as did his dad’s turkey egg roll appetizers. I feel so lucky merely to […]

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A Trans Siberian Orchestra gift to Myself!

A Trans Siberian Orchestra gift to Myself!

I probably just destroyed a few more cells in my already damaged ear drums from a rock opera/light show like none I’ve ever seen. As a day after Thanksgiving treat for myself, when I heard they’d be in town only one day, I was able to get one ticket to the Trans Siberian Orchestra in […]

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A Thanksgiving Reprieve?

A Thanksgiving Reprieve?

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you chefs out there. As I told you: Halloween is my favorite holiday. Thanksgiving sort-of comes next, because of the spiritual gratitude part of it, but it is so exhausting! Three days of constant food shopping, baking and cooking, and in less than two hours, happy hour included, everyone sits […]

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Pope approves condoms ... thru the back door?

Pope approves condoms … thru the back door?

November 21, 2010 Did anyone but me see the irony in the front-page AP headline in our local newspaper today? ‘POPE OPENS DOOR ON CONDOMS – He Calls Use by Male Prostitutes a Moral Responsibility.” What door are they alluding to? The back door of course. Well from behind or not, whether done by men […]

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A Christmas Trip to Radio City NYC

A Christmas Trip to Radio City NYC

Dear Anne & Carter, Ooooh! I just finished reading the Arts & Leisure section of The Sunday New York Times. I always read that first, before that paper’s steaming intelligent analysis of current events. I swear reading it raises my IQ ten points. But somehow ‘the arts’ draw my attention first, before all the depressing […]

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Snow White, me now? Why?

Snow White, me now? Why?

Nothing like friends from out of town coming over to get you to pick up and clean house! Since Larry went back to work, I’ve felt myself slipping back into what they used to call the ‘Cinderella Complex.’ The Disney movies were famous for indoctrinating women into cleaning up after men, in fact in Snow […]

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A Home Ec Major who can't boil eggs?

A Home Ec Major who can’t boil eggs?

One of my best kept secrets is that I was a Home Economics major back when I entered college in 1962. Yup, cookin’ and sewin’ was what most people thought it was back then. Taught in most public schools too. “A good career you can combine with having a family,” my mother said, “and besides […]

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Halloween at the D.C. Rally for Sanity/Fear! With my son!

Halloween at the D.C. Rally for Sanity/Fear! With my son!

Halloween has always been my favorite holiday, and this one topped them all. My 27 year old son called to say he’d be at a conference at the Pentagon, and my wonderful now working HUSband gave me his United Mileage Plus miles, and whoosh! there I was staying with one of my best friends and […]

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Better Living? Part 5 Swallowing it Still

October 21, 2010 Better Living? Agreed but Still Skeptical So I googled ‘trileptal & alcohol.’ It took me a while to even find their interaction mentioned on all of the websites that came up. You never know which are written by the pharmaceutical companies themselves, and which are government funded supposedly ‘objective’ sources anyway. The […]

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Better Living … Part 4 – Agreed but Still Skeptical

October 20, 2010 I’d been on “The Medication” only three weeks at the time of my ‘follow-up’ with the doc-tor. The MD Psychiatrist I let ‘evaluate me.’ The old guy. I told him about my initial reluctance, and he assured me the side effects listed on pharmacy printouts were printed for liability reasons, affected only […]

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Blushing Barefoot Burlesque

Blushing Barefoot Burlesque

What a weekend! First the Beach Boys on Friday night, and then Saturday I won tickets on our favorite radio station K-P-I-G, for a show at The Rio Theatre in Santa Cruz called Smitten. It was billed as Blushing Barefoot Burlesque by twenty lovely ladies from Garberville CA. Couldn’t be bad we told ourselves. The […]

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Me at a Beach Boys Concert? Nah …. Oh no, Ye-ahh!

Me at a Beach Boys Concert? Nah …. Oh no, Ye-ahh!

I woke up with the tune of this Beach Boys song running through my head: “Help me Rhonda, help help me Rhonda Help me Rhonda, help help me Rhonda Help me Rhonda, get her out of my hea-rrt.” Now I probably hadn’t heard a Beach Boy’s song on the radio in years, and I don’t […]

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Newspaper Headline: Eight Year Old Escapes Abduction!

O-mi-god! “That could’ve been Anne” my mind raced as I read the newspaper this morning about a kidnapping incident in the town she lives in. But, I told myself, my beautiful blonde haired blue eyed grandchild would never have let herself be seduced away from a game she was playing with her friends. She would’ve […]

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Pat’s Rising New Career – Stand-up Comedy

Pat’s Rising New Career – Stand-up Comedy

I did it! ‘had  200 crones (a.k.a. older women) rolling in the aisles! Without much training or preparation either. ‘cept knew I follies was coming and kept scribbling notes on 3×5 cards all week. ‘Aging Positively – Question Mark’ was my second stab at stand-up, the first being ‘Living Life Lubricated,’ two years ago same […]

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Flooding Back East & A Talk w My Grandkid!

Flooding Back East & A Talk w My Grandkid!

Last week as I sunbathed and swam in the 82-degree sunshine in Albuquerque, New Mexico altitude 6000,’ my i-phone had those tiny pictures of rain in New York on it when I checked the weather. When I came home on the train it was 113 in LA! This isn’t about what we HU-mans have done […]

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Better Living thru Chemistry? Part Three

September 30, 2010 Long story short, when I picked up THE MEDICATION at Cost-Co and read the insert about possible side effects: dizziness (it was even on that tiny flap they put on the container), fatigue, nausea, constipation, (it was already hard enough for me to ‘eliminate’ most mornings!), depression, suicidal thoughts, mental or mood […]

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Better Living Through Chemistry? Moi? Part Two

September 14th, 2010 When I arrived at Community Hospital’s Behavioral something-or-other center, and the MD/Psychiatrist came out of his office in a walker to get me, I knew he was old school! (Actually that’s a lie, his walk was quite spry for someone pushing 80). During  the intake history about family dysfunction and my overachieving […]

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My Kinda Camping!

My Kinda Camping!

I just drove 567 miles from California’s central coast down thru it’s ugly dry belly (Bakersfield) and ended up at Arizona’s edge in Needles as sun was setting casting shadows on the desert mountains and a full moon was rising! Whoopee … a road trip! And am I glad I convinced my traveling companion on […]

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Better Comedy Day

Better Comedy Day

I drove two hours up to San Francisco for this festival billed as “the comedy version of Woodstock! ” Found a parking spot near Sharon Meadow in Golden Gate park as the fog turned to rain then lifted and a crowds of a few hundred, not quite thousands tripping out, sat in the mud and […]

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